Chillin’

  I believe that I, like many writers, am essentially an introvert. I love nothing more than to be home all day, puttering, writing, walking, thinking –  alone. I have to consciously guard against spreading myself too thin in the outside world.

For example, if you read my blog, you’ll know that, recently, I spent a week in Las Vegas with Dh. Then, right after, I spent a weekend at the Hotel Wilber with writing friends, and also attended a gala Masquerade Ball with dancing friends. These things were great fun, I’m very grateful for the opportunities, and it’s necessary to come out of hibernation. But after this whirlwind of activity, I felt depleted of energy. I’m still recovering!

If I don’t have quiet, solitary time, I get cranky and eventually end up angry and depressed. I guess it’s all part of bein’ a writer. Or just part of bein’ me. It’s good to realize and make plans, taking it into account.

Singing . . . “Make the world go awaaaaaaay . . . “ 

Do you ever feel like this?

Progress

  One thing I’ve learned over at the Romance Divas site is that some of those divas are more focused on their works-in-progress than I am. They also hold themselves accountable for moving forward with their writing. So I’m going to start doing the same here on my blog. I’ve added a new Category called “Progress.” 

Now, what is “progress”? I’m in a quandary when I read writers posting how many pages they’ve written each day. Of course, it’s important to get those first drafts done, but what about editing and submitting? I often write in bits and snatches, with a lot of thinking, going back and forth, and editing as I go. Simply posting a number of pages per day won’t reflect how I work. 

I could post about the “hours/minutes” put into the project, and what I did with that time. That approach might be better for me.  

I’m already holding myself accountable in one way. On the wall of my bedroom, I have a Betty Boop calendar where, every month, I post the number of “Writing Submissions Mailed Out” and the number of “Pounds Lost.” In January, I lost 3 pounds and mailed out 3 submissions. I could post progress like that here, too, and call it the “Monthly Boop Report.”

I know. I know. Maybe you aren’t interested in reading my reports. But this is important to me! I’ve got to hold myself accountable, so I can move ahead with my writing. You can cheer me on (which I would appreciate), or just skip over those posts labeled “Progress.” 

You’re Not the Boss of Me!

AOL had an interesting article today on “Why Men Ignore Their Wives.” It could just as easily be called “Why Women Ignore Their Husbands.” According to the article, people have ”Reactance — the inclination to do the exact opposite of what’s asked of them by a boss or loved one — simply because they are trying to resist someone else’s encroachment on their freedom.” It has long been accepted as common behavior by psychologists.

“My husband, while very charming in many ways, has an annoying tendency of doing exactly the opposite of what I would like him to do in many situations,” one woman said. (Of course, this applies to real life, not online behavior, where lovely fantasies reside!)

The most recent study shows that the resistance happens subconsciously. ”Reactance to others is so automatic that you can’t possibly be expected to control it — if you don’t even know it’s happening.”

Might this be the answer to why men sometimes refuse to be loving and romantic, when they know it’s what their women crave? Or why women sometimes frustrate their men by withholding sex? Or why you can’t get good service from some “clerk jerks,” no matter how patiently you try?  It’s not personal — it’s “reactance”!

Troop Commander Wales

 Please don’t send Prince Harry to Iraq! 

I felt nothing but dismay when I heard they were considering it. Of course, he’s not more important than other young men, and it’s too bad that any young men have to go to war. But why send the third in line to the British throne? He has the position and platform to accomplish things — humanitarian, artistic, philanthropic, whatever – that other young men cannot. Harry may turn out to do absolutely nothing of value, but he does have the opportunity, if he rises to it. That’s the difference between him and all the other young men we also hate to risk. I would think he could find better things to do at home than go off and become “canon fodder.”

I know Prince Harry has said he wants to go, but I feel that’s just the macho braggadocio of a 22-year-old. Since he’s gone on record for being patriotic and brave, can’t they just keep him home now?

Prince Harry would make an excellent  target, both for the Iraqis and for his own men. I’ve read that royals have always had it hard in the military and in school, because in later life, men loved to be able to say “I kicked the future King of England!”

Hasn’t the royal family had enough heartache? Why add to it with the death of Prince Harry?

Sue me, but I think sending Harry to Iraq is just wrong on so many levels.

Character Torture

  “Readers read to experience tension.”

“Readers read to experience tension.”

“Readers read to experience tension.”

That’s the message of the first lesson in Linnea Sinclair’s new online class, ”Character Torture 101.” As Linnea says,

“What you do to your characters, you are doing to your readers. And your readers WANT to be tortured. They want to experience life to the fullest, with all stops pulled out, without a net, and with their respective patooties swinging in the breeze.

Because in their real lives, they cannot.

See, they want to live life to the fullest, guns blazing, tumbling down a cliff, sunk in passion, enraptured beyond recognition—and do it from the safe and comfortable vantage point of their easy chair.”

Makes sense, doesn’t it? Linnea got that first sentence above from Swain’s Techniques of the Selling Writer. Now I’ve read Swain and that sentence many times, but I never stopped to think about what it really means. I’m about to find out!

The workshop is completely free to anyone who signs up at  http://romancedivas.com. This is a great writing site I found through Robin L. Rotham’s blog. Lots of information and forums where you can post and comment about romance writing. In fact, I just saw Robin’s comment about Lesson 1. The Romance Divas site is also where Robin posted her free story, Seniorella. It’s hawwwwwt!

I really recommend the Romance Divas site to all romance writers. It’s a fun site with lots going on. See you there!

We Want You!

   Men, would you like to be popular and have women fawning over you? I am recruiting all men in the proximity of Lincoln, Nebraska, to come to our Basically Ballroom Friday-night dance parties!

Last night, we had our Masquerade Ball, in costume, with great music, free food and wine, and lots of fun. About 30 people attended, and everybody had a great time. The only problem was that most dancers came with a partner. Oh, we passed the men around, but we need more men without steady partners. According to studio-owner, Kim, the shortage of male dancers without partners is “an industry-wide problem.”

The Basically Ballroom Studio website lists some of the benefits of ballroom dancing:

Some of the Benefits
of Learning to Dance

Getting more fun and enjoyment out of life Gaining increased confidence Meeting people and making new friends The many health and physical benefits An improved social life Relaxation and exercise Improved appearance Self improvement Acquiring grace, poise and posture Overcoming shyness Release of tensions and stress A hobby Increased popularity For recreation and entertainment Gain the admiration of others Self expression Social ease and assurance A sense of achievement

So don’t be shy. Nobody will scrutinize your dancing or laugh at mistakes. We’re all too busy trying to look suave and debonaire ourselves!

You can go to http://BasicallyBallroomStudio.com and print out a Gift Certificate for a Free Introductory Lesson.

The same offer holds for unattached women and for couples who would like to begin dancing! All are welcome, so come on down! 

Hotel Wilber

  Nebraska Romance Writers is an active group. This weekend, we held a writing retreat at the Hotel Wilber in Wilber, Nebraska. Some stayed three nights; I stayed last night.

For those of you who don’t know, Wilber is the “Czech Capital of the U.S.” It’s a little town of 1,500 mostly Czech people with a rich heritage. They host the Czech Festival every summer, complete with kolaches, a parade, beer gardens, and the crowning of a Czech Queen. During the Festival, Wilber’s population surges to over 50,000. The Hotel Wilber was built in 1895; it’s very well-kept, with something interesting and charming to explore in every nook and cranny.

Six of us stayed up late, gorging on home-made food like sausage, sauerkraut, and potato dumplings, brainstorming our writing projects, making 2007 plans for the group, chatting, and laughing. Then we slept in quaint little bedrooms filled with antiques.

This afternoon, we visited the Czech Museum, where a woman sat at a loom, weaving rag rugs. I’m not Czech, but I did feel like I was traveling back in time, to small-town Americana. 

I had never been to Wilber before, and this was a great weekend get-away. It’s our 2nd Annual Retreat at the Hotel Wilber, hopefully to be continued every February. Just another perk of belonging to NRW, the local chapter of Romance Writers of America.

Where the Hell is Matt?

   I belong to a great group, Prairieland Romance Writers, and noticed that a fellow member, Paige Parsons, visited my blog and added me to her Blogroll. She has since deleted her blog, ”Hear Me Write,” to spend more time on her writing, but here’s one of her posts that appeals to two of my loves — travel and dancing. It’s so cute!

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pkh5opBp6K4 

A young man, Matt Harding from Seattle, quit his job to travel around the world. He made a video of himself dancing in many many countries.

Dance on!

A Queen’s Perfume

 What did Marie Antoinette smell like? It’s a mystery, since no whiff of her scent remains from the 18th Century, and it’s almost impossible to really describe what something smells like. But those of you who share my fascination with perfume will be intrigued. I recently read in the newspaper that Francis Kurkdjian has created a perfume that might have been hers, or similar to what she wore.

He began by researching Marie’s surroundings, likes, and dislikes. He scrutinized her bathing habits  and her personality  (she was the first to introduce bathrooms to Versailles). He learned that she favored the flowers of the Trianon garden on the Versailles estate. He scoured ”musty boxes of centuries-old documents warehoused by the French government” to discover her favorite fragrances. He read the historical words of her personal perfumer — “fruity, heavy, flowery.” He used only natural ingredients — no synthetics.

What did he come up with? “A perfume fit for a queen, which he has named “Sillage de la Reine” – “In the Wake of the Queen.” It’s an amber essence of jasmine, orange blossom, tuberose, iris, cedar, and sandalwood.

I wonder if she really smelled anything like this perfume? Our modern noses might, or might not, like her scent. Historical times were smelly and odiferous, and the rich used potent potions to mask these odors. And, of course, every perfume smells different as it warms to the body heat of different skin. 

If you would like to sample a whiff, the perfume sells in an 8.5 ounce, numbered Baccarat crystal flask for $10,500. A smaller crystal phial containing just under one ounce is available for $450. The money will be used to purchase Marie Antoinette’s ornate wooden traveling case from a private collector at a cost of $455,000.

Ah, the romance of fragrance!

And ah, to be a Queen, smelly or otherwise! 

Gordie Brown

 Another little treat from the Venetian in Las Vegas — Gordie Brown who appears there regularly. Here’s a short clip of him from the Letterman show. His impressions of Robert DeNiro, Jack Nickelson, and Christopher Walken make me laugh out loud, so I thought you might like to lighten your day a little:

http://www.gordiebrown.com/video_pages/tv_david_letterman_hi.htm

Enjoy — and Happy Valentine’s Day!